Negative Behaviors in a Relationship

03.05.2018

Romance can easily make us too blind to spot all (or even some) types of negative behaviors signalizing that we might be trapped within an unhealthy relationship. At the same time, it is quite difficult to accept the simple fact that the love of our entire life can possess disgusting and sometimes even dangerous qualities. So, how can a person that seems to be so fantastic and wonderful have such absolutely horrible tendencies and habits just a few moments later?

Well, since nobody is perfect, and all of us grow and change with time, hopefully, any mild issue within your romantic relationship can be successfully resolved. However, particular negative behaviors in adults might only be taken care of by putting the end to the partnership and breaking all the existing ties with your other half. Some of the negative communication behaviors that most partners might exhibit tend to stem from their own insecurity and the actual desire to establish total control and dominance of one side in the relationship.

The point is, romantic partners can sometimes make unfounded cheating accusations, cruel remarks concerning your goals and dreams, or even try to convince you that all your grievances are simply made-up due to your own inferiority issues and complexes. If that’s the case, you should never ever put up with a person who constantly makes you feel unimportant, dram or unworthy just in order to build themselves up. What’s more, you should never ever EVER put up with a person who compromises your entire relationship.

As the negative behavior definition may suggest, ignoring negative behavior of your partner and trying to coexist with it can hardly be a good idea. So, make sure you check out the following list of negative behaviors you should never tolerate in your romantic relationship.

Negative Behavior Patterns You Should Never Tolerate in a Relationship

1. Verbal abuse

It’s common knowledge that some of us may actually accept verbal abuse even without acknowledging it. While physical abuse usually comes with bruises that can be spotted visually, emotional one is often characterized by one partner’s manipulative comments and generally controlling actions that cause self-doubt. In this case, the victim of emotional abuse often refuses to view the mistreatment as abusive. Instead, they develop some sort of coping mechanisms of denial in order to deal with pain and stress coming of the abuse itself.

Such abusive behaviors of your partner to keep an eye out for may usually include your partner humiliating you right in front of your family or friends, forcing you to always ask permission before you are allowed to go where you wish, taking anger out on you for whatever reason, calling you all kinds of names, and the list can go on and on. Constant emotional abuses can finally result in critically low self-esteem, total or partial withdrawal from the family and friends, anxiety, depression, mental disorders, and giving up on your ambitions and goals. And, no doubt, you certainly deserve much better than that, still recognizing and leaving an abusing romantic partner is a process that can take time. Sometimes, a lot of it. So, be sure to take advantage of each available resource and hotline as you gather your courage to finally leave such “loving” relationship.

2. Physical abuse

If your romantic partner physically abuses and humiliates you, gathering all your courage, and the ability to step away from the relationship is a long-term, pretty much troublesome process which can also be additionally complicated by particular economic barriers, in addition to other issues. So remember to always be kind to your own self, while also recognizing that such romance is not worth your time and life energy and that you do have every right to leave the “loving” relationship. Once you have decided you are absolutely ready, be sure to take all the necessary precautions and steps to make your departure easier and, most importantly, safer. Keep in mind that there are many ways to keep your own safe when you have chosen to leave the relationship.

3. Body shaming

Every time your partner tends to shame you for your particular features, such as weight, appearance, and so on, not only is it absolutely cruel and immature, it may also be a manipulative manner to convince you that you would never be attractive enough for themselves, that you simply cannot leave the relationship, because nobody else will love you. It is your partner’s sickening method of establishing their dominance and hegemony within your partnership. You are so beautiful! Lots of people out there know you are beautiful! You don’t really need to stay with that individual whose internal ugliness makes them convince you otherwise.

4. Your partner ignores your sexual needs

If your relationship partner constantly rushes through foreplay only, just because they are convinced their need for pleasure more important than your sensations, or makes you feel really bad about your own sexual needs simply because they require slightly more effort, or often pressures you into those activities which make you highly uncomfortable, step out and voice your sincere dissatisfaction and discomfort without feeling shame.

5. You are kept away from your friends

There can be several explanations for why your significant other appears to behave this way, and, without a doubt, all of those are bad for you. For instance, your precious partner might know that some of your friends dislike your relationship for pretty solid reasons, and thus attempting to draw you away from those people pointing out serious flaws and concerns about your partnership. People who think they really can claim you to separate from the outer world can never be trusted.

6. You are constantly accused of cheating

Accusations of cheating are one of the many examples of negative behaviors often occurring in romantic relationships. So, if your lover constantly accuses you of being unfaithful, despite that fact you have never cheated on them and there is absolutely no cause for suspicion, then something might be going wrong. Your partner must accept that you still are a personality outside of your relationship, and you actually were a person before the relationship. And that doesn’t actually mean you are being unfaithful, or that your partner can speak to you like you got busted while cheating. All it really means is that you still are an independent personality, who has many other people in their life for different reasons.

7. Your partner interrupts you

Though it is said, like, all the time, it’s an absolute truth: Communication is one of the most vital components of any happy romantic relationship. So, if your partner always interrupts you knocking you down at mid-sentence, even if that might be in a non-malicious, poor habit kind of way, you should point it out to them. If the next time they try to interrupt you or start talking over you, just ask “Do you really want to talk or just a set of free ears?”

8. Total control

When you are totally fine having accepted staying in a relationship with somebody you want to share your life with, however, you should never accept your significant other taking control over you and your actions. The intention of your partner to establish a total control over you is a frequently occurred negative attention seeking behavior in adults. In this way, if you let them tell you what you must do and what you must not do, how to dress or which people to spend your time with, it’s highly likely that over time your controlling partner will think they have an absolute control over each of your decisions.

9. Your partner always puts you down

Sad as it actually seems, some people are ready to give nearly everything in order to make their partner feel happy and, in exchange, they often get put down and are cruelly humiliated. If your lover simply refuses to value who you truly are, or tries to make you feel ridiculous in front of other people, the best thing you could ever do is to leave that person as soon as possible. Allowing others to behave in such way will only make them feel superior and convince them that they have every right to abuse you whenever they want.

10. Lack of trust

One of the fundamental virtues of any healthy romantic relationship must be trust. This key element allows both sides to feel confident enough about the person they have chosen to be around, although they may not always be together, so it will make them feel safer precisely in the knowledge that they can count on each other at this very moment. The lack of this ingredient, though, whether in both parties or just one, will ultimately lead to suffocating your relationship with jealously and constant arguments.

11. Lies

Lies are so far one of the greatest enemies of a happy relationship, not just because they can affect trust but they also might become quite a useful tool of manipulation. And while it can be pretty inoffensive to occasionally tell a white lie, allowing this bad habit to become a new way of life can easily burn the entire relationship to the ground. Lies may appear to be interpreted as certain infidelity, and if they happen regularly, they will serve as a trigger to realization that the person by your side is not who they say they are.

12. Emotional blackmail

Such people who always try to manipulate their romantic partners usually analyze their own feelings and emotions in depth so that later they are able to use those to blackmail other people around. Generally, they try to build sort of a concept of toxic love, where all their actions and decisions are validated simply because “they love you.” So, how to change negative behavior of this kind? First of all, it is of a great importance to be strong while facing this type of blackmail, because even the tiniest sign of your weakness can allow your partner to feel like they still have the control.

13. You partner’s flirtatious nature

A little bit of flirting had never hurt anybody. At the same time, if such behavior turns into a continuous habit of your partner, it can possibly lead to more severe problems for a romantic couple. Flirting with somebody you are not involved with might suppose that you do not respect your partner’s feelings. And as for the innocent side of a relationship, it can make them feel worthless.

14. Taking for granted

People who are fine overlooking this type of behavior almost always end up regretting it. No doubt, being taken for granted may hurt a lot, as you let someone else rule your personal life and call the shots. Although it can be okay to adjust from time to time, losing your self-confidence is never right. You just can’t let somebody else, even if you love them very much, constantly make you feel insignificant as an individual.

15. Double standards

Any relationship requires all the sides involved to be treated equally. Indeed, the same goes for two partners in a romantic relationship who should be investing totally equal amounts of time and energy in their relationship, where everything must be shared evenly. This may include household chores, time, money, and each partner’s deal of effort. When one side starts pulling back or is not as committed as the other one, the partnership is bound to fail.
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