What to Do After First Date

22.11.2018

The first meeting in any relationship between a man and a woman is of great importance. It brings a lot of emotions, shapes the impression of a new acquaintance, lays the foundation for the future or demonstrates the impossibility of further romantic communication. However, even if everything goes perfectly, the evening ends, and we have to part ways.

And after that, both partners start to think about what impression they managed to make and what to do after the first date. Of course, every relationship is absolutely unique and individual. But some general advice for those who do not want to follow their instincts, still exists.

As a rule, if the date went well, the first day after, both participants are in a light euphoria. It is conditioned by the chemical processes that take place at this moment in their organisms. A huge number of hormones of happiness drown out any external and internal negativity, putting on your eyes "rose-colored glasses".

Despite the fact that all thoughts at this time are busy with pleasant memories of the last evening, you need to find the strength to analyze the situation. First you need to understand yourself and your impressions. The main question is what kind of continuation this relationship requires. Perhaps close communication has strengthened confidence in the great future of the couple. However, with the same probability, it could show that mutual interest will always remain at the level of friendship or end after a stormy but short flirtation.

Then you need to analyze the behavior of the vis-a-vis person. This is necessary for a sober assessment of the chances of continuing the relationship. If the partner was shining with happiness and sincerely interested in the conversation, you can safely expect to continue the story. But the demonstration of boredom, constant glances to the sides, and periodic "immersions" into their smartphone most likely indicate that the meeting will remain the only one.

Considering that girls are more emotional and often give out wishful thinking, the second part of the analysis should be made more scrupulously. For this they will have to recall in details all the words and actions of the young man. Separately, it is worth concentrating on his views, because often men give out much more truthful information than they would like.

Having carried out a comprehensive assessment of events and come to the conclusion that the relationship must be continued, you can build a tactic of behavior. Typically, young people prefer to maintain a small pause within 2-4 days after the first date. This method is considered almost a win-win for obtaining consent to the next rendezvous. This is explained by the fact that for such a period of time the girl "will reach the necessary condition". She will have time to get bored and seriously doubt the effectiveness of her charms. And therefore the long-awaited call will almost certainly be received by her with a great joy.

At the same time, all the rules of decency dictate to the girls when after the first date she has to sit and wait for the initiative from the man. The basis of this is the assertion that imposing "prey" discourages the representatives of the stronger sex desire to continue the game. This is quite legitimate if it is an experienced macho who has the makings of a leader. He will be really able to do everything possible and impossible if a girl needs him.

Such a tactic is true only if the first date ended with sex. In this situation, any manifestation of interest from the side of the girl will almost certainly put an end to the potential relationship. Why? Excessive courage will necessarily be interpreted by the young man as accessibility.

However, do not forget that stereotyped lines of behavior, tested by many generations, in reality sometimes give a result, the opposite of the desired. Therefore, considering the strategy of actions, it is first of all necessary to evaluate the individual characteristics of partners.

For example, a time-out can be interpreted by a girl quite differently. A confident woman, more often having a negative experience, is quite capable of thinking: "Since he consciously torments me, then I do not need him, because I do not want to suffer again." Therefore, there is a small probability that the call after the pause will remain unanswered.

On the other hand, there are extremely impulsive girls who cannot wait. It is much easier for them to live through the not established relationship than to sit by the phone for a couple of days.

Along with this, pathologically shy men are found. It is absolutely useless to wait for initiative from such a person. Most likely, he does not dare to dial the coveted number, being in full confidence that they have already forgotten about him. In this situation, a woman needs to take relationships into her own hands and manage them, independently creating her own happiness. Therefore, it is necessary to solve who and when has the right to call or write after the first date only proceeding from a concrete situation. However, one rule is still better to observe regardless of the circumstances. A man must invite the girl to the second date, but the girl should rather confine herself with conducting a neutral conversation.

The first romantic meeting is not always perfect. The fault may be external - lack of time, mistake with the choice of place, and internal - emotional factors. For example, people who become sometimes clumsy, silent or, conversely, incessantly talkative, inconsiderate, etc.

If, despite all the failures, the relationship is desired to be continued, it is possible to try to start again. However, to smooth out the bulk of negative impressions, both participants should wait for the time. As a rule, 2-3 weeks is enough to make the bad memories go to the background.

The first date is rarely really the first meeting, the sudden termination of contacts after a romantic evening seems unnatural. This is especially true for modern online dating, which includes endless correspondence in social networks and chat rooms. Even more comical is the situation when colleagues, who yesterday gossiped over a cup of coffee, suddenly start to shun each other. In order not to feel excessively awkward, in such cases it is possible to maintain familiar friendly communication, simply postponing the discussion of the first appointment for the desired term.

After first date tips

When communication with a girl stops for unknown reasons, especially if you have communicated well previously, it is difficult to decide immediately how to behave. If you really need this communication, you should look for a contact.

What to say after first date?

Needless to say, she should respond and provoke a dialogue, but she is worth speaking out. If the reason is not clear, you can write to her a message that you did not want to offend her, and if it did happen, you should apologize and say that you want to communicate with her, as you did before. At the same time, clarify that her behavior is unfair to you, because you are not even aware of the reasons for such a drastic change. Having read this and understood your point of view, she can act in two ways. Either to restore communication and explain, if she appreciates these relations, or just to keep silent and continue this game for a long time. If the reason is known, it remains only to explain and begin to restore normal communication.

How long to wait after first date for a second date

It is said behind the scenes that a man should call 3 days after the first date and invite to a second one. That is, during this time the girl will not worry if she does not get a call from you yet. You can call just one day after the last meeting: she will have a day to scroll the first date again in her head and decide whether she will go for the second. It is not necessary to invite her to a second meeting at once - just to find out how she feels, and to chat about common topics. The next date can be scheduled in a few days or a week. But the next meeting should be exactly no later than 7 days. Otherwise, the young lady might think that the man still has someone or that he did not really like her. If there is not yet a chance to meet or the second date will not happen soon, until this moment, you should call up at least once every 3 days to keep in touch. This will reduce the risk that the young lady will accept the invitation from another person. If you keep in touch, the girl will come up with a continuation of the story in advance and will consider that she is already busy with you.

When to text after first date

Online dating etiquette after first date

Texting after first date plays a significant role in the relations that could be maintained or, on the contrary, - not. So, the first date was held. You parted with the feeling that it makes sense to have a second one, and it is likely that this may all be the beginning of a long-term relationship that you have been waiting for. You promise to call, or to write a message. Of course, a man should call traditionally. But, you said goodbye with the words "I will call definitely!" And, when should this be done?

There are many different laws, norms and rules in society in addition to those that are prescribed by law. Similarly, there is a certain etiquette of dating and first date. The problem is that every person knows that there is etiquette, there are certain rules of behavior, but believes that the rules are for all. And this is the main difficulty, because of which people do not coincide. Simply, these norms of behavior are very different in different groups of people. And there are a lot of groups, they differ socially, and culturally, and historically, all have different interests, way of thinking. Someone, for example, takes on a European style of behavior, someone patriarchal, someone follows others who are also not homogeneous.

Call or text after first date?

Older people used to use the phone and call personally. It has always looked more respectful. Now there is no such requirement, because the means of communication have changed. Therefore, if correspondence on such an important issue is allowed by both partners, then, of course, it is better to write. This is better, because many people experience great excitement when communicating in the beginning of a relationship, so a message will be less stressful.

If you do not know when exactly the girl expects messages from you, all you can do is rely on your own norms in this regard. Male norms are based on two main principles: Do not lose self-esteem. That is, it is believed that a man should not rush to get into a girl’s pants, but endure for a while, otherwise his value in the eyes of the lady falls. Note that this norm is supported by the opinion of a woman. If she is not too worried about any rules, then you can write to her whenever you want (of course, not at 3 am), this will not drop your dignity. Do not be too intrusive in order not to scare the girl. If you start ringing or texting right after you said good-bye, and, also the next morning, in the daytime, and in the evening, then the lady can get scared of such pressure and even disappear from sight. And, this is also true, as a too intrusive partner may be prone to problematic relationships in the future, and this is dangerous.

Firstly, you can text or call directly the next morning after a date and say that everything was fine. You can also try to schedule the next meeting, for example, on the weekend, to spend time together longer, or, for example, on Friday - a traditional time for pastime in this way. The message should be calm and unobtrusive, warm and sincere. Most likely, the girl does not answer immediately, but she will not delay it for several days. So, the normal response time is in half a day, from the moment you receive your message.

What to text a girl after first date

In some cases, the correct message after the meeting, changes the outcome of the situation to the best side for the guy. Therefore, it is extremely important to know what to write to a girl after a date. Many guys make the mistake of sending compliments to her, writing directly that they liked her, or, worse, they send poems.

Ask a provocative question

Every time a girl starts dating a new guy, she tries to look the most attractive in his eyes. And this is natural! However very often it interferes with normal communication and seduction, as its "mask" creates many barriers not only for you, but also for her. If you want her to take off this mask, you need to show / hint to her that you know about all her weak points. Provocative questions will come in handy here.

Remember a moment from a date where she behaved not very attractive (however, it is not necessary to look for such a moment - you can just try to catch on something insignificant).

Recall an interesting moment from the meeting

This option is similar to the previous one, but unlike that, here we do not set ourselves the goal to praise or force her to take off her mask. We just remember some interesting moment from a date that will make her smile. For example, if at the moment of your meeting you smiled at her but suddenly stopped, then write to her about it. Example: "You shocked me with your eyes and I did not even understand why I hesitated when I came to you. Maybe you have a gift - a piercing look? Yes, so that I forget about everything. ;). "And there is no such thing that nothing interesting happens on a date! Unless you had quite a boring banal date.

Follow up after first date

Initially, the relationship can be slightly awkward, especially after the first date. Listen to your feelings to determine your next actions. Think about whether you want to go on a date again, and if the answer is “yes”, then tell your companion about it.

1. Remember that this is just the first date. Sometimes people jump to conclusions after the first date. When trying to make an impression of a meeting, do it from different perspectives. It's just one date. If you did not like it very much, or vice versa, you had a wonderful time, remember that this is just one meeting, and do not rush to conclusions. Even if a spark does not break out between you, it does not mean that it makes no sense to see this person again. If you had a good time, give a second chance, unless, of course, there were any obvious alarm signals.

2. Try not to analyze too much. It's important to listen to your feelings after a date, but try not to go into too details, it can do more harm than good. Do not get hung up on the meaning of each touch, hug or other gesture. Although sometimes such small details can tell about some features of a person, at the same time, they may not matter. For example, if your companion during the dinner checked their messages, you may think that this is a sign of disrespect and inattention. If it happened just once throughout the meeting, maybe they just looked to know the time, or were waiting for an important call. At this stage, try not to attach much importance to this.

3. Decide if you want to go on a second date. Sometimes you know for sure that there is a desire to meet again, and sometimes it is not so easy to make a decision. No one forces you to go on a second date if you do not want to, but if you had a good time, then it's worth giving a person a second chance. At the same time, if on a date you felt uncomfortable, and you were neither interested nor cheerful, you should try your luck with someone else.

4. Pay attention to any suspicious signals. Sometimes they appear immediately, at the first meeting. If a person behaved repeatedly rudely and inappropriately, perhaps you should not continue to communicate with them. For example, a person laughed or rolled eyes in response to your serious comment. Or almost did not participate in the conversation. Or you felt uncomfortable all evening. Trust your intuition. Do not continue to meet with people if they don't like you.

5.Think about the level of attraction. If a person does not attract you at all, then do not waste time on a second date. But remember that you cannot feel the wild attraction immediately, especially if you are nervous. If you feel that a person is worthy of your attention, even if he or she did not sweep you off your feet at first sight, then it is worthwhile to go on a second date to check if the spark does not break out.

Ghosted after first date: what to do

Many men at least once in their life faced a situation where the girl was categorically unwilling to communicate. It comes to the moment when there`s no contact after first date. The girl does not come into contact, and what to do if the girl just does not want to communicate?

Another person's soul is like a dark forest, but a woman’s is the darkest. If the girl does not want to communicate when there`s no contact after the first date, there can be many reasons. If you want to find out the reason why a girl avoids communication, you should analyze your behavior in the last days of communication. In some cases, the reason lies only in the capriciousness, dreaminess and inclination of the chosen one to exaggerate, and sometimes even in deliberate tactless behavior. The most common reason for silence is offense. Ask yourself a question: "Why, doesn't she want to communicate with me?" Men tend to analyze the behavior of the taciturn woman, and not their own.

Maybe she was talking about something very important for her, and you did not react properly, or forgot her request, or ignored the appeal. Analyze the date and remember why she stopped the communication. Perhaps, the reason was really grudge. Before you understand the reason for this behavior, remember if she told you recently about any problems in the family, with best friends, or at work. It is possible that she does not want to communicate because she is completely immersed in solving problems that you did not show attention to. In that case, it would be appropriate to write to her asking whether you can help her somehow.

There are lots of interesting articles on our best European dating website.